silence speaks volumes

So a lot of people say that actions speaks louder that words, often times I would agree that, that is true. Silence however breaks all volume barriers, I think. For instance, I mentioned earlier that I lead a worship team and it is my pride and joy. There is one thing that makes it hard. My church is very reserved, not by religion just by nature. We are mennonites, it just happends that way. Older folks tend to be more so than my generation and my parents generation. You see they think that worship is only worship if it is a piano and a song leader. So when there is a full band, like -JeDidiAh- they don't sing. They have never and probably will never say a thing about it to my face, but thier silence speaks volumes more than any conversation would. This crushes me. Absolutely crushes me. People tell me "Ash, shrug 'em off. You are doing what you are called to do. Don't allow them to destroy that, don't give them that power. " That is hard. Their silence is so loud when we lead worship sometimes I can't even hear the music. The thing is, music is not nessisarily worship and worship is not necissarily music. It is where you heart is. You can be tapping your toes along with the beat a raising your hands and not be worshiping. It isn't about what you do on the outside. Not to say that EVERYONE needs to sing a participate in worship in that way. But there is a differnce between worshipping in your own way and not participating to make a statement. Like the casting crowns songs says, we are the body. So why do that? I really don't know. All I know is it crushes me. I know however that God is pleased with where my worship teams heart is at. So I guess for now I need to remain focused on worship and try to shut out the pericing silence.

Ashley Marie